Ww parents are programmed for milestones.
First tooth.
First step.
First word.
Then there are the milestones not listed in any baby books and for which no sterling silver keepsake boxes are made.
I still remember the day when my oldest, Alex, was 6 and I discovered he could throw up by himself. Weird, I know, but I did rejoice.
Up until then, we’d dealt with plenty of misses. When children don’t feel well, they consider it imperative to tell a parent, walking right past the bathroom on the way or getting up from beside the ice cream bucket by their head and walking through the house.
On this day, however, Alex was sitting in his dad’s chair — I had taken precautions by covering it with a towel — while I went outside to get something. When I returned he said he’d gotten sick.
I looked around the living room with dread and asked “Where?”
“In the trashcan,” he said, pointing beside the chair.
I was in heaven.
This school year, I’m celebrating a new milestone — the boys getting themselves up in the morning. Of course, at 12, 14 and 16, you probably assume they can do that. But it’s been hard for me to be trusting.
Growing up, my parents left the house by 6:30 a.m. They always woke my sister and I up before they left. The one rule — we had to be out of bed and sitting up in the living room before they left. I guess they never considered we might fall over as soon as we heard the garage door shut and fall back to sleep on the sofas.
For our part, Greg and I have a system. I leave for work while everyone is still asleep, and he’s in charge of getting them up. Usually, I will call the house around 6 a.m. to wake Greg up so he can get the boys up.
In years past when deer season has rolled around, I’ve modified the arrangement because Greg is out of the house by 4 a.m. most days. Early on, I’d just go to work later, making sure all boys were up and out of bed before I left.
Later on, I adapted the routine. Before I’d leave in the morning, I’d put the cordless phone in Alex’s room. When I called home at 6 a.m., he had to get out of bed to answer.
Late last month, Greg headed to Canada for a week of fishing with a couple of buddies. Aaron became my little policeman in the morning.
He gets on the bus at 7 a.m. and chooses to set his alarm for 6:10. Alex and Luke don’t leave the house until about 7:20 and don’t need to be up that early.
So I put Aaron in charge of getting his brothers up. Usually by 6:30, Aaron is dressed and waiting for the bus. When he reached that point, I asked him to go into his brothers’ rooms and turn on their lights.
From there, I said, he was done. He wasn’t responsible for them getting out of bed. After all, I remember the battles when my sister and I graduated to me being responsible for getting her up.
The first few days of our new routine, I would call the house about 6:35 to make sure Aaron was ready to go and had awakened his brothers.
Eventually, I’ve quit calling, not even going back to giving Greg a wake-up call. I’ve decided that if he sleeps through his alarm, Aaron will still wake up Alex and Luke.
So far, it’s working beautifully.
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